How to put your confidence hat on
/You have a part inside that believes in yourself and your potential.
That’s why you’re here.
It’s ready to learn. It’s ready to grow.
It’s that part of you that in spite of self doubt will try and go for it anyway.
It feels good to connect with that part of you, doesn’t it?!
There’s also another part of you.
A part riddled with fear and self-doubt. Afraid of the world or even…yourself.
Most people try to get rid of this part.
They lacerate it with shame and judgement. They wish it didn’t exist, try to kick it out or hide it.
Is that you?
It feels as though it doesn’t belong or shouldn’t do…at the least.
For so long, this is what I would ALWAYS do. It held me back in every way imaginable.
To be fair, I still fall foul of it at times but not quite in the way I used to.
If a lack of confidence (or courage) is holding you back, read on.
You see, these parts of yourself, I think of them as inner people. I’ve learned to do so through years of coaching and therapy.
My fearful one, I think of as my inner child (she’s also goofy as pictured :)
The other one, I often think of as my inner grown up.
In fact, I think of myself as having more inner family members than that but we’ll stick with just these two for simplicity.
They’re both part of me. They’re both inner family members and just like any family, they can have conflicting needs, wants and desires.
AND, they both deserve that I take care of them.
We’re building an inclusive, internal, inner world over here :)
I share all this to provide some understanding for what I’m about to write.
Whenever it’s time for me to step up and put my confidence (or courage) hat on, I will frequently visualise my inner grown up taking the hand of my inner child and saying, “I’m here. I’ve got you. I’ll handle this. You don’t have to do it alone. Doing this will be better for both of us in the long run.”
That way, my inner grown up gets to go for what it wants AND my inner child gets to feel some sense of safety in the process instead of being berated or pushed aside.
I could write all day about what else this kind of mental picture can do for you but for now, I’ll allow this initial image to percolate in your own mind.
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